The Wee Hrs of Mourning

Well I guess I am not a blogger, but a random writer. I think we all need to take breaks in life. I think they are essential to keep the juices flowing . ( Did I need a vacation??) I am amused with myself right now as these past10 months have been a wild roller coaster for me that is certain.  This blog post might be a bit introspective and perhaps somber to many, but a truthful one at that. I usually write  funny things about life, kids, lessons learned and  my perspective through it all. Today I am a little more serious in my thoughts.  New to the  single life this past year was tough enough, but not as tough as the sudden loss of my mother, the ordeal of putting down my beloved retriever "Gunner" , sending kids off to college, and relocating to another state . It has been one heck of a journey!  Many life altering circumstances came rushing in like a flood and almost overwhelmed me this year!  The life changing events of the past 12 months could have taken me out. I must say, I almost believed they would! But, here I am - reentering the outside world. I am emerging from that warm cave of retreat. It had become a somewhat darkened, lonely,  and deeply emotional pace, and yet I feel the need to rename it all. To say what has happened did not change me would be a disservice to  my belief in a Good and Merciful God.  I learned about myself this year. Yes I have! I have learned I am extremely forgiving, deeply faithful, and not at all controlling as many have spoken about me.  I have learned much  more about life so much more about people. I mean, I have heard these words and perhaps even read them somewhere, but I am  saying I JUST LEARNED them.They have actually sunk into my spirit like a heavy weight.  I have learned you can't really know anyone as well as God knows them. You will never really know them inside their thoughts. It is impossible.  I have also learned life is delicate and beautiful and short. Way too short not to say I love you, or give hugs, or even share a cup of tea. The biggest thing I have ever learned is this-
Seasons in life are just that...Seasons! God created them for us so we could spend time in the deep winter and then come out for Spring. To enjoy our Summers and reap the blessings of the Fall.  I have come through a deep, very dark Winter and can feel the warmth of spring emerging in my soul. I have His promise through His Resurrection that I will be OK. I am going to make it like everyone else is going to make it who has this faith in Him. I am renaming that place-  JOY. Yes, it is now called JOY!
I will never be the same and that I believe is a good thing because God will get  the Glory in  what the enemy of my soul meant for my harm!
So here's to JOY!